Two sad posts in a row? I must be PMSing

I have one follower. I know this person. That makes it not as exciting. It seems most people only read this blog if i ask them to. No other reason. I'm not inspiring people. I'm just another person trying to be famous on the internet. I will always just be another person. There's nothing special about me... I'm invisible. That's what i will always be. In a public place i will always be alone. I'm not good enough. I repel guys... because who wants to date me? I'm annoying. I'm fat. I'm gross. No one seems to catch on when i flirt, then when they realize I'm flirting, i imagine they gag and make lame excuses to leave. I'm not going to get a job. My friends that are leaving will just forget about me... i'm going to get fatter over the summer. I feel miserable right now but you know what? I'm going to keep going. I'm going to keep trying. I'm going to go out to the world with the most beautiful fucking mask on that you've ever seen and win an Oscar pretending to be ok. I can't let my friends know that i'm weak. I'm their rock, you know? People look up to me. If i'm weak, then what would they think? I have to be strong for them. I have to try... no matter how much my heart gets broken, i'll still carry on because i'm pathetic like that. If no one notices me in a crowded room, I'll deal with it. If i feel alone, i'll get over it and talk to myself or something. when i feel fat, i'll just get on the internet and search fat people and make myself feel skinny again. This is me. I look strong... but i'm really like an egg... easy to break and messy on the inside.